FOR THIS year's Feedback competition, readers were invited to invent a new scientific word that we need and define it in an appropriately pompous way.
The competition attracted more entries than any previous one, and the standard was impressively high. The first shortlist of potential winners contained more than 50 entries, and whittling it down to just 10 was quite a challenge.
We were interested, too, to note that in a competition about word definitions, readers embraced such a variety of definitions of the word "pompous" - including, in some cases, the short and the pithy.
But who are we to argue? The word's the thing - and here, in alphabetical order, are the 10 winning neologisms, chosen with the judicious help of the New Scientist staff.
Coyotus Interruptus A momentary suspension of the law of gravity, usually accompanied by the sudden realisation of impending gravitational acceleration. The term is derived from the name of its discoverer, Wile E. Coyote (Carnivorous vulgaris), who often observed the phenomenon when, in pursuit of Road Runner (Accelerati incredibilis), he was propelled at high velocity from a precipice of sedimentary rock by an apparatus of his own contrivance or by a commercial product, such as Fleet-Foot Jet-Propelled Tennis Shoes (ACME, Inc).
Jacqueline Jaeger Houtman, Madison, Wisconsin, US
Demiverse We only have eyes in the fronts of our heads, so the existence of a whole universe is an unwarranted assumption. The known fact that people turn round and walk into you after buying their ticket demonstrates that there is only a demiverse, and that there is a delay in the unobserved half re-establishing itself.
Clive Bashford, London, UK
Encyclopediatrician A person dealing
with the knowledge of all branches of children's stuff.
Jay Thacker, Gaithersburg, Maryland, US
Helixir A drug to improve longevity that is based on a person's genetic make-up.
Frances Smyth, Palmerstown, Dublin, Ireland
Hypochronia Medical syndrome caused by having insufficient time to achieve the day's tasks. Symptoms include cold sweats, jitters, inability to concentrate, rudeness towards colleagues and family (on rare occasions when patient is at home during waking hours), and a tendency to spend time creating and rearranging computer checklists of things to do rather than actually doing them.
Simon Grove, Taroona, Tasmania
Illusogenic A class of drug produced by the unscrupulous in response to the ailments of the gullible (for example, hair restorer).
John Wake, Harlow, Essex, UK
MonotologueA lecture or presentation delivered by one person on one subject with one viewpoint in one tone and
one rhythm.
Jim Watt, Birmingham, UK
Stringfellows Collective term for a
group of harmonious physicists.
Neil Donovan, neildonovan89@hotmail.com
Terarist Presenter who intimidates
his audience with large numbers.
David Craig, Edinburgh, UK
The Hogg's Bison Undiscovered theoretical particle of matter requiring $800 billion in funding to find.
If found, it really will enable pigs to fly.
David Lloyd, High Wycombe, Buckinghamshire, UK
CONGRATULATIONS to the winners. Thanks to the generosity of its makers, they will each receive a bottle of Labrot & Graham's award-winning Woodford Reserve bourbon whiskey, and, thanks to Cambridge University Press, they
will also receive a copy of Climate: Into the 21st century, the overview of our weather edited by William Burroughs.
AND here, exclusively on our website, are the 10 runners up in the competition. Congratulations to them all.
Extrapogenesis The action or method of causing to come into virtual being, with spurious authority, all of the heretofore from a remnant of the hereinafter - for example, reconstructing the lifestyle of a dinosaur from a fossilized toe bone, a Roman villa from a fragment of tile, or two versions of a Viking helmet from a small piece of iron oxide (Fe3O4).
Susan Wilkinson, Sevenoaks, Kent
Incamerafelinity An angst-ridden state characterised by the feeling that one is a cat stuck in a box about to die as a result of the random act of science one doesn't understand and, worse still, that nobody will notice, leaving one stuck in an unresolved superposition for eternity. "I awoke in the same strange room, unable to shake off a persistent incamerafelinity."
Peter Fyfe, Sydney, Australia
Mulidibescence The process by which female scientists disappear from the list of acknowledgements in scientific papers. New Latin, from Latin mulier, woman; dilabe, vanish and Extropy The amount of energy available in a system. Prob. from entropy, the amount of energy not available in a system, coined for those unable to understand entropy.
Michael Grounds, Strathfieldsaye, Victoria, Australia
Nanomaly A very tiny but significant discrepancy in one's experimental results.
Neil McIntyre, Market Harborough, Leicestershire, UK
Nasteurisation Total flavour destruction of beer by flash heating and cooling.
Catherine Side and friends, Pangbourne, Berkshire
Neotechnaphasia The result of being rendered speechless (usually with anger) as a result of the introduction of new equipment or software. Later stages indicated by suffusion of blood to the face, sweating, heavy breathing and a pounding session in the hands as these are brought rapidly and frequently into contact with a desktop. Violence can ensue.
Eric Dale, Worcester, UK
Phonolimbo or Telesuspension The time when one is put on hold when all lines are busy, and an operator "will be with you shortly".
Roger Wicksteed, Oxford, UK
Qwertyoptimism The naive hopefulness that one's string of recently acquired inexplicably random data will somehow fit into a natural order or sequence not yet obvious, through a sudden insight hitherto never before experienced; or that the results will be reproducible with the judicious employment of an infinite number of diminutive primates applied to an indefinite aggregation of parallel coprocessors, attached to an exponential quantity of alphanumeric data input devices extrapolated into the fourth dimension, without any meaningful limit to that parameter whatsoever.
Jan Kaliciak, York, North Yorkshire, UK
Thermokineticpseudobardism The rare tendency of suspended particles to briefly take the shape of random lines of Shakespeare through the effect of Brownian motion.
John Storr, Carlisle, Cumbria, UK
IT ONLY remains to thank the many hundreds of you who entered the competition, and also the many thousands of you (yes, really) who have written to Feedback over the past year with contributions and comments.
It is impossible for us to respond individually to everyone who writes, and we are only able to publish a small fraction of the contributions we receive. But we do appreciate them all.
Feedback would be nothing without you.
So, to all our readers: happy holiday, and best wishes for the new year.
